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The Public Ineffectual

For entertainment purposes only.

Thursday, October 07, 2004

A Man's Guide to Romantic Gifting

Romance is thoughtfulness taken to a higher level. Imagine making your girl a cup of tea and magnify 100 times and - voila! - you have a foot massage. Its really that simple. MacGuyver once made a candle lit scented bubble bath using only a washing line, spare tire and baking soda.

Romance is not material. Don't always spend a lot of money. She may suspect you are an "easy answers" man which is not what you want, even if you are. The only exception to this rule is diamonds. In this case, spend a lot of money and spend frequently.

Romance is the anticipation of desire. Don't just plug something she already owns into Amazon.com or the like so you can see that "many people who liked x also enjoyed y." She already knows how to do that. Go one remove further and its perfect, go two and its outré.

Romance is in the details. If you can show evidence that you l-i-s-t-e-n to her, YOU ARE IN LIKE FLYNN.

Romance is a card once in a while. Gift wrapping is a start but we also know its because the nice girl at the store took pity on you. This retail saint can also help with the card if you're willing to ask.

Romance is experiential. Think: How do I want to be remembered?

Romance is NOT spontaneous. The two can be easily confused. It must only appear uncontrived but it is meticulously planned.


At 5:43 AM, Blogger cow said...

Romance is not spontaneous, I agree. But you have to be very careful in what you do. It's not about pleasing yourself (it does but in another way), it's about pleasing the other, it's about creating a magical moment for the other. And it can be very simple things sometimes.

Something Important that Many women forget !!!!

Romance is both ways...

I know only a few women who have thought for example to bring me flowers I like: Renoncules, Pivoines for example. Or offer me a book of poetry or invite me to a restaurant without warning me or so many things...

At 12:09 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have to say, I think romance is over-rated (like sex? *cough*). Romance makes me think pink :P

Honestly though, I think everyone has their own special brand of romanticism and it can get confusing! Certainly does means paying attention to the other and coming up with well–thought-out surprises, at the very least.


At 6:30 AM, Blogger cow said...

Well some people will never get the API. It doesn't make them bad, they just have disabilities for certain things. I don't have the API for music, some people don't have the API for respect, love, romance, humility or sex. We all explore our talents in different domains, it can be gastronomy, music, poetry, photography, etc.

"""Je vous aime, pas d'un amour de vacances, d'un amour d'un instant, d'un grand amour dont je veux les tristesses comme les joies, d'un amour où je suis engagée corps et âme, si lourd, si précieux que parfois j'en ai le souffle coupé."""
Correspondance croisée 1937-1940 de Simone de Beauvoir, Jacques-Laurent Bost

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